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15 ways to tell a guy you love him without scaring him off

Should you tell a guy your true feelings for him? Well, this can be dangerous if there is no established rapport between you; even then it may not work in your best interest. Here are some risk free ways to indicate your interest in someone without dragging your integrity in the dust.

1. Smile at him often

2. Compliment him about the way he looks, dresses, work etc.

3. Play fight with him e.g. Jokingly punch or play a boxing match

4. Help him with some work, project or event he is planning.

5. Listen to him.

6. Challenge him to become a better person.

7. Do not take crap from him. Confront him if he embarrass, belittles or hurt you or other people. He will admire you for standing up to him.

9. Believe in him even when he doubts himself.

10. Be there for him if he is going through a bad batch or rough times.

11. Give him space, don’t crowd him too much.

12. Don’t overwhelm him. Give him a chance to miss you.

13. Make it OK for him to leave if he wants to.

14. If he wants you to, go with him to places like football or fishing.

15. Talk favourably about him to others especially his friends.

202 thoughts on “15 ways to tell a guy you love him without scaring him off”

  1. Hi Gia,

    From what you have said I think he already knows that you like him or have some sort of feelings for him, just as you sense he likes you by the amount of time he spends with you and the little things he does. However like you he may be uncertain about verbalizing how he feels.

    Maybe he is indeed in a tight spot. At this time he may need your support and encouragement. You may want to let him know how much you believe in him and that you are confident that he will find someway to get through this. Also let him know that you will be there for him, regardless to the outcome of the situation, because he is very important to you. Tell him that you are happy to help in whatever way you can.

    This can go a long way in letting him know how strongly you feel about him

    Do let us know the outcome of your choice
    H

  2. Hi Hilton,
    Today me and my friend were taliking to the guy i love and my friend blurted ou that we think he loves me. I think he likes me as a friend kind of but i dont no what to do.

    I cant act myself around him none of my friends no do you think i should tell them?

    From turtle787

  3. Hi Turtle,

    You should only confide in people you can really trust, who will not let your secrets out and will not cause you any embarrassment. They should also be able to support you in times of need.

    If your friends have these qualities then I guess you can share your secret with them

    Hilton

  4. I’ve been with this guy for nearly 2 months, he has told me he loves me but I never say it back. I feel a bit bad about doing that but I need to know if he is actually means it. We met on line, I fell in love with him from the first moment I saw him! So how can I tell him I love him without sounding stupid?? Help please!! Xxxx

  5. Hi guys,
    I sit opposite the guy I love for English reading and he always looks at me and we have a moment where we gaze into each others eyes but the girl he sits next to flirts with him so me and my friend think she loves the guy I love I can’t help feeling jealous the problem is I’m only 10 so I don’t quite know how to ask someone out.

    Can someone help please

    From turtle787

  6. Hi Megan.
    There are many ways to indicate that you love someone other than saying “I love you”

    Make a list of the things you admire about him and let him know. Knowing what someone like and admire about you can be more powerful than just hearing the words “I love you”

    H

  7. Hi Hilton,
    Me and one of my other friends were talking before school this morning and she bought up this conversation about the guy I love and she wants to ask him should I let her?

    From turtle

  8. Hi Turtle,

    I guess you want some definite proof of his love. This will be seen more in the way he treats and responds to you, however it would do no harm for your friend to sound him out.

    H

  9. hi, so I like this guy, he is in my taekwondo class and he is the TA. he is a year older than me and he is graduating in a couple of weeks, we have become friend but not really close ones. I invited him to see a movie with some friends that we have in common and he said yes. I really admire and look up to this guy and I think that is the reason I started liking him. I don’t know if it is even appropriate fro me to like him due to the fact that he is the TA (he just helps during warm up and showing techniques but he does not determine the grade for the class in any manner.) I don’t know if he likes me but I do like him a lot. Should I tell him something? please help

  10. Hi Hilton,
    What should I say if I tell my friend I want her to ask him if he loves because sh will be suspicous of me and she might guess.

    Help!

    Turtle

  11. Hi Martz,

    You have done well in inviting him to a group outing. I would continue doing things like this to build a friendship raport with him before you decide to break the news. This way you can become true friend without the pressure and tension of love that can easily make you vulnerable.

    Hilton

  12. Hi Turtle,

    I thought your friend wanted to do this, anyway one way is to ask your friend to say who she would recommend as a boyfriend for you. If she mentions him then ask her, if she feels he likes you. You can then explore ways to find out together.

    Hilton

  13. I like this guy, who happened to be my trainer. i have started liking even though i know he is already dating.i become alil reserve in his presence and very shy too.he treats me alil different that’s probably because i’m much senior compared to other mates.the point is i’m really liking him and for the first time i feel like letting someone know that i like the person.is it right or wrong? i’m expecting any response from him although deep down i wish it work somehow..what am i supposed to do…i hate my self for this!

  14. Hi Mockingbird

    No need to hate yourself its natural to get attracted to someone who tick our boxes. My suggestion is to become a good friend with him before exposing your feelings. You can start by telling him that you admire his teaching/training skills and ask his help to do something.
    This guy has a lot of ideas on how to secure a man’s heart do check it out for more ideas “Capture his heart”

  15. Hi Mockingbird

    No need to hate yourself its natural to get attracted to someone who tick our boxes. My suggestion is to become a good friend with him before exposing your feelings. You can start by telling him that you admire his teaching/training skills and ask his help you to do something.
    This guy has a lot of other ideas on how to secure a man’s heart, do check it out for more ideas “Capture his heart”

  16. Not Telling Name

    I like this guy and I want to tell him I like him without him knowing it’s me. How do I do that?

  17. Hi Hilton,

    Since I last commented a lot has happened. My friends no about my secret, they have asked the guy I love if he likes me and he smiled, so my friends think he likes me. The guy I liked try to get me together with another guy, in going out with someone else but I’m still head over heels in love with someone else.

    I seriously need help!!!

    Turtle

  18. Hi Turtle
    I suggest you kindly decline the offer to be set up with someone else. At the same time try and build a friendship with the guy you admire by asking him to help you with things or asking his opion about things he is good at. Always express your appreciation for his help

    Hilton

  19. Hi Hilton,

    The guy I was going out with I dumped him. Now my friends are saying the guy I love loves one of my close friends, I feel jealous,

    I dunno what to do?

    Help!!

    Turtle

  20. Hi Turtle,

    I fully understand how you feel, however such is life we cannot MAKE someone love us. Sometimes the people we love don’t seem interested and the ones we don’t care about are dying to get our attention like the guy you dumped.

    I still recommend that you keep your options open. If you can do develop a friendship with him if not try and develop other friendships and interests.

    Hilton

  21. Hi Hilton,

    I understand what your saying, I’ve tried my best to try and make a friendship with him but its too awkward. My friend finds if funny so she makes is talk. I’m stuck on how to not show my jealousy, have you got any ideas?

    Turtle

  22. Hi Hilton,

    I just want to thankyou for all your help. I have one question for you and that is can we help who we fall in love with?

    Thanks

    Turtle

  23. HI Turtle,
    Great question. The short answer is yes and no.

    Usually we cannot control who we become attracted to, however we can chose who we make a commitment to. Attraction is not a choice but love is a decision. That is deep but I hope it helps

    Hilton

  24. Hi Hilton,

    Thanks, my friends have given up and I’m ok even though I’m still single.

    Turtle

  25. Hey, I like this boy, but he hates me I tell him I re about him I love him with all my heart it just breaks my heart because the way he talks to me.:,(

  26. Hi Kaylee,

    I am sure there are people who love you but you do not have the same feelings for them. Similarly there will be people you like whow will not share the same feelings. Its something you will have to accept.

    Hilton

  27. Hi, i believe that i saw you visited my site thus i got here to return the want?.I am attempting to in finding issues to improve my website!I guess its adequate to make use of some of your ideas!!

  28. There is a guy I like and he likes me too but
    I probably won’t see him for another two
    Yeara and i really want to see him. He is also
    Two years older than me.

  29. I been liking this guy since high school. we both had crushes on one another but we were to scared to tell each other. so we both had graduated then suddenly he hit me up on facebook. so we started talking then he wanted space because he was going through some problems with a girl he was in love with even though he was having problems i was there. so we got even closer then he told his mom about me she ask him who i was to him he said she us my friend. we been kicking it. for seven months he even toik me to va to see his father and his dad ask i wad to him he said i was his girlfriend . He don’t express his feelings to me bur he knows i care about him and i show him so much affection i have even said i wanted to get married on day he said don’t want to get married because he don’t trust no females and then he said he would get but he don’t want to. i wondering so should i stay and see wat happens oh yea we been together now for seven months

  30. Hi Kaleigh
    I am not sure why you will not see your friend for another 2 years, however you can keep in touch on the internet using skype, msn, google hangouts etc. If you don’t know about these simply do a search online for tutorials on how to use them.

    Hitlon

  31. Hi Ssweet…

    While it is clear that you are both attracted to each other, I can see that you want different things in life – you want to get married and he doesn’t. He doesn’t even trust women – which means he doesn’t trust you. I have to say that you will be seriously disappointed because he is clear that he has no intentions of fulfilling your expectations. It is not wise to stay in such a relationship.

    Hilton

  32. To all the people commenting on here that are 16 and under, remember a few things. First off if you think you LOVE someone but, aren’t even actually dating them it most likely isn’t love but, infatuation. Very different things. You cannot truly love someone you don’t really know. It can take months and even years to truly know a person to their core and to honestly have mature love with that individual.
    Secondly, remember the person you are with when you are in high school and even college is probably not the person you will be with forever. It does happen for a select few however, it is NOT the norm.

    To all these people wondering if a guy likes you. . . Just ask. Talk to them. The worst thing they can possibly say is no. If you are friends and it ruins your friendship the an it probably wasn’t the best friendship to begin with.

    Dealing with love life issues at ANY age sucks, however at 10-16 as most people commenting here appear to be just let things happen. Personally I think 10 is far too young to be dating. I have a 5yr old daughter and I can promise you she will not be having one on one dates with anyone at that age. Maybe at 16 would be the age I would allow her to actually go on a date.

    Focus on school and other things at that age. Not love interests. You’ll benefit more in the long run than you would if you spend all your time worrying about whether or not a boy you won’t remember in fifteen years likes you or not.

  33. I met this guy online and he is really nice and cute I give him my Skype and he added me I texted him in a while but one day he wanted to Skype me but I am too shy

  34. Hi Cindy

    Having a conversation using text, phone, email or skype is just one way of getting to know someone better. If skype is too much for you maybe you can start with texting or email

    Hilton

  35. There’s a boy and he really likes me and I really like him but we both aren’t allowed to date but we really want to like he says when we go to sleep I would say I love you but that would be weird so ill say I like you so ik he really likes me, I want to go out with him and he keeps asking if he asked me out if I would say yes and I always say yes, I have a feeling that he’s going to ask me out or say I love you what should I do???

  36. Hi Riley,

    You sound as if you are still in school. I understand that your interest in boys may have just started however you are still too young to start dating. For now just continue to be friends and enjoy doing things together in a group rather than on-to-one dating which can get rather messy for young people.

    A commnemter – Reeling – says it righ. Here is what she said:

    To all the people commenting on here that are 16 and under, remember a few things. First off if you think you LOVE someone but, aren’t even actually dating them it most likely isn’t love but, infatuation. Very different things. You cannot truly love someone you don’t really know. It can take months and even years to truly know a person to their core and to honestly have mature love with that individual.
    Secondly, remember the person you are with when you are in high school and even college is probably not the person you will be with forever. It does happen for a select few however, it is NOT the norm.

    To all these people wondering if a guy likes you. . . Just ask. Talk to them. The worst thing they can possibly say is no. If you are friends and it ruins your friendship the an it probably wasn’t the best friendship to begin with.

    Dealing with love life issues at ANY age sucks, however at 10-16 as most people commenting here appear to be just let things happen. Personally I think 10 is far too young to be dating. I have a 5yr old daughter and I can promise you she will not be having one on one dates with anyone at that age. Maybe at 16 would be the age I would allow her to actually go on a date.

    Focus on school and other things at that age. Not love interests. You’ll benefit more in the long run than you would if you spend all your time worrying about whether or not a boy you won’t remember in fifteen years likes you or not.

  37. omg plzzzzz help me I really like this guy he hugs me all the time were besties we talk all the time but he shows no emotion twards me he just looms at me and smile and turns around and talks to other peoe like im not even there …. I need advicee really bad >_<

  38. Hi Jen,
    First of all you seem to be so much into this guy that you are coming over as being desperate. This is a big turn-off.
    If you are such good friends maybe he is uncertain about how you will respond to him, so he hides his feelings by pretending not to have emotions.
    Perhaps you may want to step back a bit and give him some space and a chance to miss you. Although it may seem counter-intuitive it could be just the thing he needs to crystalize his feelings towards you
    H

  39. I was in class when my ex-boyfriend came up to me and was talking to other people who were in my group for a project so i started talking to him too. Oh, did i mention i also still had feelings for him? Well i do. Anyway so i thought it was just your basic, friendly conversation but when i got home, i saw that he texted me so i texted him and he kept sending me a smile face or lol every time i would say something. Then i texted him saying see ya later and he said bye with a smiley face so i texted him a smiley face and then he started texting me again. But i asked him why he felt like texting me. If it was just to say hi or what. And he said yeah (meaning just to say hi) so we kept texting and hes still texting me now… And hes still putting smiley faces and saying “soooooo….” Idk if he likes me or not!!! And, i dont kniw how to tell him i like him without embarrassing myself. Should i just tell him?

  40. I need advise, im in love with 25 yr old and im only 15 and we love each other i know. The thing is when he first found out that i loved him he really didn’t have much to say about it. After a while we got closer and closer but then he went back to his ex girlfriend and i hated him for a long time. Well she left him and soon sfter that he showed and proved to me that he loved me. After a few months i promised him I would marry him when i turn 18 but we still date other people. And a few days ago i found out something about him that i never would thought would be true and he said thats why his with the girl his with now because he didn’t want to hurt me. Itold him i’ve always believed if you truely love a person that you will except them for who they are and what they have and everything and i said i would. The thing is its seems like his pushing me away and don’t got much to do with me. What should i do??

  41. Hi Briannbowen,

    I must tell if you, if he really want to be with you he would make it happen. As much as you love he you must accept his decision and free him to go on with his life. He may change later but to force a relationship may backfire.

    Hilton

  42. Hi Rdurniok,

    I would not force the issue, if he likes you, let him come out and establish a clear intention of relationship with you
    Hilton

  43. Ok so there’s this guy at my school who’ve I’ve Been totally crushing since the first day only to find out my friend likes him too how do I tell her if I even do and what do I do??HELP!!!

  44. Hi Kk0…
    This is a sensitive position, however you need to be clear about how you feel about your friendship, do you think you can have a discussion about it with her? How did you find out about her crush? Do you think she knows about your crush?
    Also who is this guy showing interest in? His choice will have to be factored in also.
    Hilton

  45. I go to this high school and I just started, im in a form with this cute guy, Luke Fields. ive asked my friend to ask him out for me but sadly he rejected. I still have this huge crush on him. I get shy in history and French because I sit one table away from him. I just cant get over him, the way he flips his hair, his attitude and his unique smile. ive never actually talked to him neither he talked to me, ive never actually speak in class but I have with his best friends, Josh. I have to sit next to Josh in science, im trying to gain friendship with him but it isn’t working. can anyone help me?

  46. I’ve been seeing someone now for almost a month. Things are going pretty good so far. We are spending a lot of time together hanging out and me staying over to his place. He’s very sweet and usually fronts the bill if we go out. Well here’s the thing, we were having a conversation and he made a statement to jokingly about me not loving him. I told him he didn’t know how I felt. So his response was asking me do I love him. I stated that I was starting to love him. I believe he feels strongly about it because he always tells me he misses me or when we’re together he asks me have I missed him. I do believe I am falling for this guy quickly, but I do want to take it slow. I believe he brought up the L word because he wants to say it to me but feels as if its to early and doesn’t want to be rejected. So what do you think and what should I do to seal the deal to know if we’re going to be exclusive.

  47. Hi Hilton

    I’m only 10 and I love a boy he is 10 and called Callum.
    We used to play wrestle i won now he just annoys me .
    I dont know how he feels can you help with advice please.

  48. Hi Aimee,
    This site is really for adults (18+) and we do not encourage children to get into romantic relationships as it is not appropiate for your age group. Right now we recommend that you have a lot of friends of both gender and focus on studying and enjoying your childhood.
    Hilton

  49. Hi Chutney,

    Although you think you have to “seal the deal” in a rush, we have found that taking it slow actually have a more powerful effect on keeping men attracted and dedicated to you than rushing into something that may backfire.

    Hilton

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