This is a big question many people debate. You may even be considering whether or not you should be actively involved in seeking and searching for your soul mate, or simply wait for the right boyfriend to show up in your life.

Some people think that you shouldn’t force things – if it is to be, it will come to pass. So they wait. They think that you are desperate if you go out actively looking for a man. You may find the wrong boyfriend. Some have tried looking and got badly burnt, so they give up. Others content that you must seek and you will find. What is the real answer?

The answer is that you should actually do both. Here is the most effective way to look for and attract your soul mate into your life.

1.       Create the intention of getting a great boyfriend. Write it down. Even write down the type of person you would like. This sends a signal to your subconscious mind that you are serious and causes it to activate a process that will cause your mind to be alert for anyone who matches the profile. It will also somehow or the other sends out vibes that will attract similar people to you. Here is a short clip of two people who made a list of the qualities they wanted in a soulmate

2.       Begin to actively engage/participate in activities, projects and events that you love but have been putting off for a long time. This will help you to meet lots of other people while having fun and expanding your life. Enjoying life is quite an attractive feature and people will begin to notice you and want to be part of your fun life.

3.       Be detached. Have the intention and participate in activities that are likely to help you meet with potential suitors, but don’t be intensely and emotionally attached to the outcome. Another way to put this is to “want a soul mate don’t need one.” It will be great to get one but don’t let your entire world get deflated if you don’t find one by Christmas. Do not force allow it to happen.

This method is not online dating. It is not dating agencies or introduction services. It doesn’t matter what age or body type you have. It doesn’t even matter how long or short your hair is, you don’t need expensive clothing.

The good news is that this method is FREE. You only need to do it consistently and you will definitely get a great boyfriend.

It is something that I have been talking about for ages. I was happy when I heard how a 63 year old told how she used it to get the love of her life. She was on bbc London speaking about it Tuesday morning telling all of London about it. Here are her exact words.

“My life is very, very full…Don’t stay home; don’t sit inside; join clubs; do courses; go anywhere where you will meet likeminded people. I would encourage people to do voluntary work.”

Let’s look at it very carefully.

First you need to have a full and varied life. Having a varied and interesting life not only gives you something to jump out of bed for but mysteriously makes you attractive. Men realize that you will not build your world around them. That can be scary. To be responsible to entertain someone else is hard work.

Secondly a varied life also means that you are out and about meeting, interacting and engaging with people. All types of people.

This lady went to do volunteer work in the kitchen of a charity at Christmas.  She said that there were “amazing people there, of all ages, from all walks of life.” A lady introduced her to a gentle man who later became the love of her life. Amazingly the man only lived up the road from her.

“I would never have met him, if I didn’t go volunteering that Christmas,” she said.

The other thing that I want to point out is that even if you don’t meet compatible people at first don’t despair. Each person you meet has a network of other friends, one of whom may be very compatible to you. It was another lady that introduced this woman to her man. This is actually the way many people meet their partners.

Here is another of her insightful wisdom.

“Don’t give up hope but don’t get desperate… you [shouldn't] force it work [either],” she said.

In other words have fun. Don’t be looking for a man everywhere you go, this stinks of desperation. Have fun and enjoy yourself. You will be surprise at the many people who will be drawn to you. You man will show up as you gainfully go about enjoying life meeting many people.

In a nutshell

1. Enjoy life. Have a full and varied life. Go out, volunteer, join groups etc.

2. Meet and engage with a wide variety of people.

3. Be detached and don’t force the boyfriend getting process

4. Do this consistently and not only will you enjoy life more you will become rather attractive and magnetic in the process.