Equality in relationships, does it work?
Should men and women be equal in relationships? Should they do everything equally and divide roles and responsibilities equally?
With the great push in the workplace to have equal pay may people also think that women in relationships should be equal treatment in everything.
In this blog I will like to go beyond equality. The psychology of a relationship is not about equality or even gender roles. People get into relationship with others who complement them.
Think about it you don’t necessarily want someone with equal skills, talents and strengths as you. People are usually drawn to others who complement their weaknesses and lack.
Whoever is good at something should do it. I have a girl friend who has a certificate in auto mechanics, her husband doesn’t have a clue. Who do you think should maintain the family car? Similarly if the man is better at cooking let him cook most of the times, if it feasible to do so. And there should be no score card or balance sheet kept.
Secondly many daily results men in relationships don’t fully understand what it is to treat woman as an equal. Does he treat her like he treats other blokes? No! Men are naturally very competitive and even crude with each other. He does not want another man to relate to. He wants someone who is feminine and soft who brings out his protective nature.
OK, how about women pay their way on dates (going Dutch)? Well I think that if a man wants to treat you, let him. At that point he doesn’t care whether or not if it is fair, he only wants to know if he can make her happy, even if it mean he has to make a sacrifice. The best gift he can get at that point, is not half of the money, but genuine appreciation for his efforts. That would mean the world to him and he will always want to do it again.
Here is a radio interview I did about it this week? Do you agree that there should be equality relationships? Put your comments bellow.