What do men want?

What do men want from women?

What do men want in a relationship?

This is a question I get asked many times when girls/women get a chance to ask me questions in private. You may think that if you get the answer to this all important question then you will have the key to the hearts of all men.

But I have found that not many women are comfortable with the answer. In fact you may be very disappointed when you get the real answer.


Before I tell you the answer let me suggest that the question does not help you to understand men totally. It may actually misguide you.

What someone want may not be the best or what is most satisfying to them. Example, you may want coke, fish and chips, but this type of food will not give you the ultimate healthy body that you want.

So it is best to answer the questions on two levels

  • What are men attracted to in women
  • What do men really need from women

The two are very different and cause a lot of confusion in both parties.

In this post I will start with the first.

Men are innately, intrinsically programmed to be attracted to and react to a beautiful woman. Whether he is the pope, priest, president or peasant in the field he just cannot help himself.

This genetic programming came from the hunter gather era when men used basic criteria to tell if a female is healthy, fertile and have good ability to bear children.

Here are the signals he would use (the same his modern counterparts are instinctively using)

  • Smooth unblemished skin
  • the hour glass shape – especially the hips which would indicate if they are good child bearing hips
  • hair – the quality and length of the hair have some bearing on the health of the person
  • flat stomachs – indicating that the female isn’t pregnant for another man. No wonder many women like to display their stomach
  • youthfulness – another indication of health and fertility.

While these are crude measurements, they are still the things which hook and attract the attention of men today. You women also know this. No wonder the beauty industry is a billion dollar industry. You spend an awful lot of time attending to your hair skin and nails. A huge amount of advertisement also go into selling products that are either anti aging or anti wrinkles.

Now this may be very disappointing to you if you don’t consider your self to be a potential model. Don’t despair. There are other things which hook and attract men.

Men are also powerfully attracted to the femininity of women. The essence of femaleness is a wonderful, awesome and awe inspiring feature of a woman, especially if you are comfortable and confident in who you are.

If you can cultivate this aspect of your being and life, despite your size, shape or age you will be surprised that men will line up to be in your company.

Next post I will be looking at what men NEED from women. I know a lot of men who have drop dead beautiful women, but are still dissatisfied because these women are not giving them what they really need.

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